For Whatever God You Believe In

Dear God

Each and every day of my life is hell.

I hate the way I feel.
I hate what I think.
I hate what I do.

There are brief moments of happiness I cannot explain - very brief moements.

I am alone in my visions.
I am alone in my thoughts.
I am alone in my Love.

I look forward to the end of my life.
It may be the only thing that brings me peace.

I bear the mark of Me.
I bear the mark of Death.

I am tormented when I sleep.
I am tormented when I am awake.

I understand this is punishment for my sins.

I am just looking for Love, not perfection, just Love.

For this I thank you.

Amen.